There are tools and a roadmap to a better relationship. The question is … is it too late?

Deciding if you’re ready for a separation or divorce is an intimately personal decision, and I have found we are often curious about separation and divorce long before we are ready to take the first step. Maybe that’s why you’re here … you find yourself thinking that divorce may be the only option.

I have met hundreds of couples considering divorce, and it tends to show up in three ways;

one. both people are ready to start the divorce process

two. one person is ready, the other person will eventually catch up, divorce is imminent

three. neither is ready, and do not want a separation or divorce and hope this will ignite a change

If you resonate with number three, and continue the same way with each another, there is a high probability that you will become number two or even number one. My data tells me that this shift from three to two can happen within a six month window.

This timeframe suggests to me, that there may be an opportunity to repair the relationship, even if you’re here, reading this.

What if it’s not too late?

The next chapter of your love story is entirely dependent on two people practicing new ways.

We were taught how to show up in relationship from and by our primary care givers. Sometimes, this doesn’t serve us in our adult life. So here we are … repeating some patterns, and hey, you may not see this yet, but you are. This is what’s happening when we are sitting in a love that isn’t what we believe it can be, or what it once was.

If both of you want to stay together, there are some easy, effective and strategic ways to learn to love better. This is also dependent on timing, because the longer we sit in unhappiness the deeper it gets … so time is of the essence.

If you are two people seeking a way back, please don’t hesitate to reach me here.

Are you ready to separate? Here are a few things to ponder …

  • It can be exciting to think about the life you “could” be living. But also consider what actually ending the relationship will look, feel and sound like.
  • Marital assets, including children will be shared equally. This is standard practice unless there are extenuating documented circumstances.
  • If we were to grade our relationship it should get no lower than an 80%. Our partnership should be the cherry on top, as opposed to a dark looming cloud.

When nothing is done, or said or fought for … there will come a point when it’s simply too late.

Sadly, I can not count how many times I have witnessed one person in the relationship having declared that the relationship needs help, that they are unhappy, that they’d like to get some couples counselling … and months or years later the other person is genuinely broken hearted and feeling blindsided. And at this point, when one person is done, there isn’t any kind of intervention that can help save the marriage.

If your partner has declared unhappiness and or a desire to get some third party intervention I strongly recommend leaning in if you want an outcome of togetherness.

The time is now.

There is a roadmap to a better, happier relationship.